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five shortcomings

I swallowed the bitter pill

Of reality that the honey

Was not sweet and the discovery

Of fulfillment left me with rancid meat

The salt lick left much to the imagination

Is this the plate, have I  misplaced my fate?

Lack of surreal taste upsets my stomach’s irritation

 

Shun grins atop the alter

That was made by reckless, wretched,

Roaring in the tabernacle gate—stretched

Out in the presence of yesterday’s date

Aroma lingering, fog glimmering

Of incense that memories escape

As your sacrifice I’m conflicted

Once as your Isaac, and now

To be closer to you

As Abraham— like father, like son

 

What I perceive as abundance I receive as plain

When I conceive perfection I concede the stain

Blood is rain, your body the branches

Yet I still complain in light of my circumstances

A broken promise enhanced with a shattered lie

I need your baptism to cleanse the reflection

Of someone I see, I hate, I despise

How you see…beauty in me…I fail to understand

Sight, beyond site, eyes of a haven I cannot comprehend

 

My prayers go without answer—are you listening????!!!!

I wail, I crash, I’m frail, I’m smashed

I’m no tree, yet I seemed to have fallen and

The mystery is that when I’m calling

The sound dissipates before it hits your ears

How appropriate are my confessions

Sweet like the wind, delicate as their origin

Uncovered are my obsessions

Translate your response…for I am foreign

 

The burdens multiplied and replaced the sand on the beach

Rocks crushed, to powder the bottoms of your hands and feet

Footprints carry me whilst in the shadow of the dark

I fail to realize your hands

They feel shaken, absent, missing their mark

I’m sure you felt alone while creating the earth

Well, imagine how I must appear

An actor on stage, recited lines spoken clear

I fear the spotlight has dimmed

When in your image, I disappeared.

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About R. Ward

A husband, father, teacher, and struggling man of God.

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